She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
