So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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