All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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