I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
True college students do jello shots in the library
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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