Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
So much rum. So many feels.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Bring me that man meat
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize