is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
