yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I smell like Dick and happiness
Randomize
