It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize