I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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