end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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