I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
my god I love twenty year old dicks
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