Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Randomize
