Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
