Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
She bit a glass in half.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
