Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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