new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Randomize
