We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
She bit a glass in half.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
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