Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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