so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
