used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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