erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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