I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
