i just identified you from a description of your pipe
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
