Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
