either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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