Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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