Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
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