He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
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