He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.