I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.