we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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