oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Randomize
