I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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