Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
