Texts From Last Night

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  (757): View more from Virginia

  I have demons in me.

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  (757): I have demons in me. http://tfl.nu/h6bj
  Replies (12) Good night (1000) Bad night (1473)
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  (705): View more from Ontario

  he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me

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  (705): he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me http://tfl.nu/ycl5
  Replies (2) Good night (711) Bad night (1565)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?

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  (781): I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I? http://tfl.nu/0o9s
  Replies (5) Good night (834) Bad night (3523)
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.

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  (318): I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away. http://tfl.nu/8l4v
  Replies (21) Good night (1394) Bad night (5478)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.

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  (404): Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party. http://tfl.nu/3iq6
  Replies (16) Good night (2718) Bad night (3521)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.

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  (608): Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard. http://tfl.nu/diwn
  Replies (15) Good night (4569) Bad night (1047)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.

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  (954): I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay. http://tfl.nu/trm1
  Replies (8) Good night (3013) Bad night (863)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.

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  (970): I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat. http://tfl.nu/yfuv
  Replies (13) Good night (2226) Bad night (1222)
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  (714): View more from California

  we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz

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  (714): we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz http://tfl.nu/j793
  Replies (7) Good night (1675) Bad night (1328)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  This is a rough morning for me

  (577): View more from

  No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.

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  (630): This is a rough morning for me (577): No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma. http://tfl.nu/q4hk
  Replies (1) Good night (571) Bad night (1124)
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  (915): View more from Texas

  I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud

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  (915): I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud http://tfl.nu/k3wa
  Replies (5) Good night (1099) Bad night (436)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.

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  (608): Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation. http://tfl.nu/o18n
  Replies (6) Good night (890) Bad night (290)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.

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  (416): Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd. http://tfl.nu/inv3
  Replies (8) Good night (567) Bad night (796)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.

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  (505): Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle. http://tfl.nu/hoqs
  Replies (3) Good night (366) Bad night (664)
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  (229): View more from Georgia

  I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am

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  (229): I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am http://tfl.nu/ozx4
  Replies (3) Good night (1096) Bad night (299)

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