i need an iv and a liver transplant
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
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our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
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As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Please. i have SOME standards
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??