My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
What a dumb baby whore.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Randomize
