That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize
