I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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