They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
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