Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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