Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Randomize
