Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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