Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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