An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
