So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Randomize