I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize
