Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
