Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize