dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
i know! what is this dateline?
he thought i was a dude.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
21 Bartenders That Are Definitely Winning At Their Jobs
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."