Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Randomize
