You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
honey bunches of taint.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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