i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
