Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
